easter...

Easter has came and gone...for us, it was celebrated a week ago. The fun that comes with divorce and split weekends also come with split holidays. It worked out well and it was a special day no matter what day we celebrated the holiday. 

We ventured down to the Bay Area for the day had brunch with my parents and sister...It was actually calm, we beat the crowds and celebrated the day with family. I have always said this little girl deserves everything I can possibly give her. She deserves holidays celebrated and she deserves everyday to be made special.

 I wish more than anything I could keep her to myself everyday and especially holidays. I wish this weekend I could have had her come down and see what the Easter Bunny brought her and search for eggs...but that's just not our reality. The reality of divorce is making due with that we have, with celebrating things before or after. With divorce, you have to rebuild holiday traditions.

So, we had Easter brunch, we had Easter baskets and we had eggs hunts...luckily she's young and this will be her normal. I'm thankful that splitting time and days and holidays will be HER normal...but I ache that this is not MY normal. My momma heart wants our normal to be like everyones normal...but what is normal? Normal is the "dream" of being married with kids and the happily every after...Is that really the normal though? Few and far between are there the people who have that. Then there are people like us and we're normal too...Kena and I...we're normal...making due with split time, making new traditions and celebrating holidays the only way they should be spent...with love.

I fear the day when Makena starts asking questions about seperate homes and seperate holidays. I'll only be able to speak from the heart when the time comes. I rack my brain wondering what will be the right words. I just want to protect this girl from divorce and from hurt. I want her to understand she's loved and will always be loved. That she's "lucky" to have to homes and double the holidays... 

My sweet girl will have a "normal" life just like all the other kids...we will have a normal family...we do have a normal family. She will know how loved and special she is. I will never let her question that out of anything.

This girl and I have this connection. Obviously, it's because I'm her momma, but maybe it's due to divorce and single parenting. I remember going through all the beginning stages and her being my ONLY focus. She kept me going...she kept pushing me. I've had to make decisions alone but based on what will be right for her...what will be right for us. So far, everything has worked out. It might not be ideal...but it's our normal. We celebrate holidays and color eggs. We love and we laugh. We have good days and we have bad...but we have each other, we are our family. No split time can take that away from us...

Here's to Easter...however you spend it. The day of or the week before. Here's to families...big or small.  More importantly, here is to your dedication to making life as normal as possible for yourself and your little...

Happy Easter....